Digitalizing

For those that know me, they know that I try to keep time and personal data off of technology. Though in this day and age, I don't think it is possible or practical anymore. I will be embracing technology again and start using the technological conveniences of a modern life more. Living life simply has taught me valuable lessons and I will keep those lessons as I progress forward. So, I'm going digital with all my books and notes, hopefully, slowly but surely. I will be getting digital copies; or I will be scanning in my books and recycling the originals.  I will be getting either a new tablet or touch screen laptop soon. Most likely a tablet. I anticipate this to be an ongoing project for at least 6 months. The fact that my room looks like an episode of hoarders with books in every nook and cranny of my room may or may not have to do with this insightful decision. Seems that the Old Book Store only 10 minutes away by foot that we got only a couple years back seems to have feed this mini monster. I am excited though; well, reasonably excited. I will miss the perks of having solid copies, but I look forward to the advantages of the digital age. Curious to see how empty and minimal my room will look as my files, books, and notes get reduced. I plan to continue that simplification with other aspects of my room afterwards (probably my closet next)

Energy

One of the most captivating concepts for me since childhood has been Energy.

Such a broad topic that fascinates me and trickles into every aspect of my life. The mind map in my mind with the word energy is exasperatingly large as the word energy is heard over and over throughout life in such various ways. And that it does! It takes various forms all which seem to fascinate me endlessly. energy flows, takes forms, is stored, bursts, visible and invisible, makes heat and electricity, allows neurons to communicate and muscles to move, it flows within us and is consumed and excreted. "energy can not be created or destroyed", its even related to willpower and emotions. Energy is what sparks my interest in both reality:possibility::science:art. It's just fundamental and can turn so intricate. etc. A favorite topic to my daydreaming mind.

Individuality

It's not often that I post about my decision making process. I tend to like to share more event related posts on my blog. It's the concept of walking the talk instead of talking the talk. However, today I'd like to share an outlook in my life that I most currently am dealing with. It will be interesting to see where I go and what I do from here on.

At "quarter" life, I am in the midst of deciding, manifesting, and solidifying my individuality. I have already become myself and who I'd like to be in many ways but there are still some hard battles left. Like meditation has taught me, it will take an unwavering focus to face the long battles I am beginning to undergo. As the gaming industry would put it: the harder levels where the consequences, risks, and rewards are amplified. Transforming and metamorphosis sometimes require the opposite of hibernating in a cocoon. A self perpetuating system of growth with the accompanying tools of building good habits, unwavering solid principles, and more confident, committed, and effort-driven resulting actions or simply put: dharma (thought) & karma (action). 

The first and foremost step is to always remind myself not to compare myself with others as everyone's journey is different. It's one of the major reasons I've kept off social media. 

The second is to find out what it is I do need and want. 

The third step is to go out and act on it.

The fourth step is to maintenance(this includes maintaining a sense of self)/progress, assess quality, and contentment. 

 The sixth step is to tweek or adapt as needed with new knowledge. 

In this way, I have begun to be able to help me help myself. In my younger days it was more about exposing myself to the world and seeing all the different lifestyles out in the world. Now a days, it's more about solidifying who I am. It's priceless gratification but also so challenging! It requires me to develop a new kind of strength through mental, physical, and spiritual training. If I am successful, it will serve me well for my current life and the rest of my life. If I find my own success, I hope I will be able to share my training at one point so that I can help others as others have helped me along in my own journey. 

Family

Today, I had the chance to go over my Masi's  (Mom's Sister's) house. I hadn't been in quite some time as I am busy with my studies and work and they had just recently moved here from Bharat/India. It was absolutely refreshing to reconnect with family. There was a warm fuzzy feeling; the kind that just leaves a slight smile lingering on a face. The problem-solving, world-observing, base-touching, and timeless conversations filled the room. Laughter and wisdom of journey paved way of intellectual debates and due conclusions for the mind to ideally ponder in this warm environment. We all felt as if we had come from the same tree even when others may say we were born and raised in two different countries with their own worlds. I felt right at home; I wasn't wrong, this is where I belong. Such a simple night that re-enforced the pre-existing value of family within me. & Dare I even say to others that it was preferable to going out on a Saturday night. (:

Full Circle - Connecting with the Mother Land

I googled my name out of curiosity recently to see what my name may bring up (in honor of gracious professionalism) which brought me back here, to this blog. It's been a while since I've posted mostly to keep a more private life as I was seeking. But here I am, brought back full circle to my old blog. I've most definitely grown since from facing challenges in my life. As my values get tested more and more, I've finally buckled down to decide on who I am. Otherwise the world will just continue to decide for me, and that hasn't worked at all for a brazen girl like myself.

As it happens to be, it is the season of Navratri, my favorite Hindu holiday. It was a fun night at the local temple where I got a break and chance to devoutly pray and ask for forgivness to the goddess Amba/Kali/Parvati etc. in my favorite forms of garba, dandiya, arti, and meditation. Although I did not stay for dandiya this time as I have clinical/school early tomorrow, I did partake in the other three. I found myself selecting more traditional garba garbs without the flashy mirrors or tassels even. I some how found solace and beauty in the simplicity of the lightweight, movement-allowing garba dress that must have been popular in my great grandmother's time. I felt lucky enough to have such traditional (or "vintage" as they say now a days) garbs as they are not made this way anymore. The skirt is so light weight yet there is so much cloth that the skirt extends much the way a mexican cinco de mayo dress would. Hard to find modern dresses that could accomplish both so I relish this unique combination that allows for simple beauty and freedom of movement. 

When I came home from the temple, I found myself talking to Father-dearest, about life growing up as a child on the family farm back in India. These stories always bring admiration, humility, peace, and sometimes laughter to my being. I loved hearing stories of my ancestors as well. It made me feel like I was a part of a bigger picture somehow and I built many values that I cherish from them. These stories always helped put life back into perspective for me when I feel lost. I've decided to restart my concise daily prayers in the morning and like Mulan add honoring my ancestors into my routine. Any who, we were talking about his cows/oxs whom he always seemed to recall after looking at people (myself included). He spoke fondly of them and told me how my great grandmother had worked with/ helped raise them. It reminded me of a very important lesson (right now I am re-seeking the lessons I have learned in life and this time writing them down so If I forget I can be reminded) that lesson being, you should give twice as much than what you receive in any co-operation and then you can expect some return. Even then, you shouldn't really expect anything in return when you give altruistically. By temperament, my very nature or perhaps great grandmother's blood makes me more of a giver and animal friendship & cooperation enthusiast. There is something so rewarding, fulfilling, and happiness-bringing about it.